‘Wealth can be very isolating’: problems rich people face, say therapists

Can money buy happiness? Contrary to what some might think, a million dollar paycheck doesn’t necessarily come with a problem free pass.

While wealth can bring with it some unconventional problems—such as being denied an invite-only getaway and accidentally destroying chunks of coral reef with a 300-foot yacht—most other problems the rich The face of may not be as inward as we think.

According to therapists that CNBC spoke with, more often than not, the most intense struggles with feelings of loneliness, depression, and paranoia, among others — a spectrum of emotions that many others share.

“Most people can’t understand how rich people can have problems. They dismiss rich people’s mental health concerns as trivial and insignificant,” says Paul Hockmeyer, a medical expert. Psychiatrists who treat the super-rich told CNBC.

A major problem for Hokemeyer’s clients is chronic loneliness.

“They live in the rarefied place of the top 1 percent where there are very few people who share the realities of their world,” said the founding principal of the Dresen Mews Clinic, who explained that The super rich often cannot fully believe if people like them who they are, or what they have.

“People see you as lucky and happy — neither can be true,” said Amanda Falkson, a wealth counseling psychologist at Psychotherapy City.

She noted that they also face aspects of emotions such as grief, trauma, losses and challenging relationships. But there is also pressure on how money is spent, and who to trust.

“Wealth can be very isolating … sometimes all eyes are on you for what you do with your money,” he said, adding that some clients face pressure to figure out how to be remembered. will, and where the money should go – whether it’s investment, philanthropy, or legacy building.

Hokemeyer observes that wealth can cause people around the super-rich to be viewed as objects.

People who are rich tend to have high social status, and people who live in positions of diminished power are often drawn to them. The latter may see the rich as stepping stones to take them to more powerful positions, he said.

The psychotherapist said her clients are often bombarded with an endless stream of requests.

“Their relationships define what they can provide to others rather than who they are,” he added. Against this backdrop, the ultra-rich become more suspicious of their motives in associating with them.

As a result, it can be difficult to examine the relationship dynamics of wealthy individuals whose partners don’t have the same wealth or income, Hockmeyer said.

Often, the spouse who is more affluent can feel that they are being “used” for their money, and the partner with less financial power can sometimes be stereotyped as a “gold digger.” is or may be viewed negatively.

There is also a difference between those who inherited their wealth or suddenly came upon large sums of money.

People who became rich as a result of their achievements. This is known as a strong internal locus of control, Hockmeyer said. They feel responsible and accountable for their life trajectory, and have confidence in their ability to earn money again if they lose it.

Conversely, people who acquire sudden wealth — whether through an inheritance or the sale of a business — may find it difficult to adjust to their new spending power, status and circumstances, psychotherapists said. . They are also less confident in managing and maintaining their wealth.

A sudden influx of wealth can often lead to existential identity challenges and strain on relationships, Falkson said.

“When there’s no need to work, where do you get your sense of meaning and purpose and structure? Have you become a dollar sign? Where do I fit in socially now that I’m in my old world now?” Not part of?” He expressed some of the concerns of his clients.

“Wealth does not eliminate our human needs. And having meaning and purpose in life are very important needs.”